All my Life...

Well not all of it but, since I was in the first grade, when I had my first Jewish teacher of memory, I was told that it is Yiddish for pretty. They used to call me things like Shayna Maidel or Shayna Punim; pretty girl or pretty face, respectively. Needless to say, people that know Yiddish or have cousins with the same name, want to know why or if I am Jewish. I am not, but I have coerced the honorary title.

So, I am making up nicknames, explaining the significance of my name, how I am so worthy, whatever the case may be. This guy starts working at my job. He is Arabic. On his first day of work he asks me if I know what my name means. I am like, yea, of course.

It means ugly in Arabic.

My life is a lie and I am utterly devastated.

Fuel for the Furnace of Achievement

It's about exercising one's full potential before the spirit withers away, in atrophy. It is not stress in the manner which makes one wants to escape, rather the ache your body feels when it tells you its simply a tool that facilitates, from the minute, to the utmost of your ability. Simply because you told it to. Making strides and building is what this life is about, it is about a universal love that is honed in the one that is you. Ergo, it can never be worth it without one hundred per cent. If I am not aching from doing, I am not living. I love it. You should to.

YOU + ME+ THAT DAMN SIDEKICK!!!!

Isn't it crazy how nowadays communication doesn't consist of telephone conversations with the other person actually being on the other end of the line? Instead, we are committed to in-personal conversations on AIM, YAHOO, MSN, and emails. I'm not knocking this method of communication because i'm a HUGE sidekick junkie, however, i've noticed that even in relationships, communicating to your partner via AIM, YAHOO, etc isn't taboo but more so an acquired look. Some people believe this method of communication can be considered a threesome (you+me+that damn sidekick/blackberry) but in this day and time the only miscommunication is no communication at all. So applause to all of those individuals who still believe in those 3 hour phone conversations talking about everything and nothing in total sum until you fall asleep!!(who actually has time to do this in 2008...especially if you live in NEW YORK) However, please don't knock the technological advancement of modern day society providing an alternative route towards love and effective communication. You can be a brand...but don't knock the TREND!!

Introducing

I was first introduced to Usher Raymond in the summer of 1993. My cousins and I were on our annual summer trip to St. Maarten (N.A.) where we spend two weeks in the beginning of August in a time share our grandmother's owned. This is before it was really popping like it is today.

We had a couple of cable channels we would be able to watch. This was usually in the morning/ before noon before we were able to get permission to go to the pool, where we spent the majority of our days. BET was one of the channels. Usher was instantly popular amongst my peer female cousins because he was the first pop singer we could identify with, as in, he is so cute, he is going to be so and so's boyfriend. This is not to say he was the first but we were actively witnessing the genesis of his career. It was exciting. Telling by our reactions to him, he is definitely accurate in dubbing himself, the Mack. Please enjoy fresh faced Usher and early 90's videos.

Looking at My Roley- It's About That Time...

I just finished devouring a mango...I think you are feeling where I am going (pause if you like but the kids'll understand)

Sad in the Pants or whatever, it has nothing to do with my face. It does, but I am going to act like it does not. I have been contemplating my sexless present and my track record. I have concluded that it is about time to dip back into the pool (no pun but, oh so clever). I love a great dicking do not get me wrong and I am not saying that I hate men and I am going to start parlaying with the fairer sex. Rather, from time to time I feel as if my rapport with men has been lacking and I am just not feeling my gender role in the rat race that is the dating game. Coupled with my fear of commitment, I need to do what I can to stave off cobwebs without having meaningless sex that I have to drown in alcohol, as a means to buttress my self-esteem.

So, I think I might find myself in a dyke bar soon...looking for pretty women with banging bodies to buy drinks and kiss up on...maybe I'll have more mangoes while I am at it.

Fuck it, why not.

Viva La White Girl...

COCAINE is everywhere... I do not know how I feel about it exactly. Whether I am utterly disgusted by the allowance of blatant reference to such a powerful and potentially detrimental drug; or extremely amused by the re-emergence of the mainstream marrying the not-so-underground society of drug acknowledgment/ usage. (read:I am not trying to 'out' anybody)

It's like the '80's- everybody does drugs. If they do not do it on a regular basis, they have tried it, or not really opposed to it. UNLESS... they are extremely drug retarded and refuse to do anything besides take Ny/DayQuil for their sickness symptoms.

Weezy chimes in on his take on Cocaine. Between me and you (no Cassie), I think he makes a pretty great point sans the last sentence, unless the gorilla/ hobbit hybrid is your thing... by all means, lick the rapper- for the gummy.

"I don't do too many (drugs). I just smoke weed and drink. But I'll never f**k with no more coke. It's not about the bad high; it's just about the acne: Cocaine makes your face break out. I'm a pretty boy."

It is always fun when drugs are unappealing for reasons other than the social stigma that goes with the consumption of narcotics. It is personalized and its honest. I raise my glass.

One of my favourite songs of the moment, remix included, is N.E.R.D.'s "Everyone Nose". I mean the title speaks for itself. It is about the coke head party girls that are under the influence that they are being discreet, as the wait on line and enter stalls two and three at a time, never squat, and flush the toilet for good measure.



Here is the Video for the original...



And if you see someone with symptoms of this new/old phenomena...Throw them a towel...its been a long night.

Friends...how many of us have them...

I am always interested in the relationship between friendships and enterprising support. Not many friends want to do their actual part in the initial jump-off, whether you have a blog and you need them to read it on the daily, if you are a performer and you need them to come out and pay money for your show, if you sell wares and you need people to support your crafts, etc., it is not going to happen if you rely solely on your friends. It happens all the time, to a lot of people, I am not going to say I am only on one side of the fence. Like TreZure the Empress (www.myspace.com/trezuretheempress) says, I am not looking for friends to support me; I am looking to fans. When people genuinely see where you are coming from, without the ties of familiarity, they will support you based on their relationship to your genius. It is just the nature of the game.

No one knows whether or not their wings are going to carry them until they have already jumped out of the nest. Then it is Fly or Die, as N.E.R.D. so eloquently put it (btw sooo excited for Seeing Sounds, their third album).

I go for what I know and keep it like that...rewards will follow.

So, even if I am my own known audience right now, I make it work and keep dropping these posts like they are hot.