So, these are some of things that happen when you waste your mental energy attracting bullshit activities and bastard tactics in lieu of attracting your happiness...
A very dear friend and I attended a networking/ happy hour, as alcohol is the tried and true social lubricant, and amidst the sitting in the corner talking to each other, she was introduced, by a host, to the man that gave me what I have been looking for.
They had already begun their conversation when I joined them. I had been politely chatting it up with an old acquaintance. Either way, I enter at the part where he was stating that most of the people at the event were young, had only been out of undergrad for a couple of years. Usually, when people reach a certain age they do not ask about one's profession. He was also telling us that he had not realized it, until he had gotten older, that sisters need to bag brothers while they are still in college that is the only place where you will have a concentration of black men that are about their business. As the women that concentrated on their careers get older, its slim pickings and they end up bitter, since they decided to put it off.
We are like...ok
Meanwhile, he is complaining about the party, waiting to leave so that he can go elsewhere. When it is time for my friend and I to leave, he tells us to write our names down so that he may 'facebook' us later. The next morning I see I have a friend request, I accept, and a little while letter I receive a message in my inbox. The correspondence lreads as follows:
him: so hows married life lol?you didnt mention that last night whenI was discussing bagging a brother when young lol
me: no, i am not married, lol. in any way. it was something my friend and I did a while ago and she won't let me take it down.
him: ok send me your cell number if you like ....ciao
I sent my number, out of curiousity, since no man has ever "asked" for my number and ended with a ciao. At least not one that feigned interest in me. Anyway, after a text test run, you know when people send you a text so you can have their number and upon your response to having received it they take that as a green light to communicate, I receive a text over the weekend asking me if I was free. Wzup. Do you have a car? And are you free today like 2:30?....
really?
Essentially, he wanted to take me to the homo thug convention that was Joe and Chico DeBarge performing at Summerstage. He did not want to drive but he guessed he would since I did not have a vehicle. I opted out since I had to do something, like my nails. Later, he asks me if I wanted to see Anita Baker the next day. I said yes. After a delay in my train situation, he picks me up from the train station slightly annoyed. In the car he points out the place I need to watch my step when exiting because people tend to miss it and the dirt is hard to get out. You know people, when they come to your house or get in your car don't respect your shit. I took note, just in case I needed to ever get back into his car again. Circling, looking for parking, he is so annoyed we can not even have a conversation, I suppose he was concentrating on not having the bitch fit we both knew he was capable of. We finally find a parking spot and he is complaining about the circumambulation the barricades require. I am already at wow. We reach the barricades and have to walk single file... he walks in front of me and does not check for me until we make it all the way into the park. Now that I think about it, there were men doing their jail workout in the playground area of the park...so, yeah.
Either way, we found a spot to sit down, after moving three times, and he is annoyed because he can't see the stage. After a couple of minutes he gestures to these women in front of us and says I think they're, ya know. Lesbians? I asked, he said yes. He then asked me about my experiences and I shared what was pertinent, then I asked about him. He flipped. Outraged, he shifts his body language so that he has cut me off, and asks me if he looked like a person that experimented. I said no, because it was opposites day, for that moment. He then, after cooling down a bit, says a man is usually not going to tell you right away if he has experimented. He'd probably wait a year or so to tell you something like that.
Again, really?
Time passes, every ten minutes or so, he stands up and looks around for a good three minutes, my guess is to cruise. He sits back down to say that it may sound conceited but the woman that ends up with him forever is lucky. I asked why. She has more to benefit from the situation than I do. Women need stability and I have that. I envy her, actually. Not to mention he said he was loyal, thats all he could reveal at the moment, I would see what he was talking about. Like I really want to participate in the anal wart fuckery of a down low man. Not to mention, I have not heard a man, that was interested in women, say and rationalize his masculinity the way he had. Saying he is not really emotional, would never back down from a fight, that as a man he does not need love, and women need that. And women need to be with one man but because he was a man he could be with 50,000 women. And the only time he touched me, at all, was to show me where to watch my step in his car.
I had to leave early and I did.
That's what I get for asking for stupid shit.
